So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
