margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize