Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize