Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
