You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
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