i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
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