it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
