Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
