brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
