Me. At least after what I've been through.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
