I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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