like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize