i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
