I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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