her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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