Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
