TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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