how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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