You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Randomize