He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Randomize
