At least make sure they are 18
Why
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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