Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
