found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize