I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Randomize
