just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Randomize
