He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
