I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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