the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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