I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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