if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Randomize
