I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
