rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize
