We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
