My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
