I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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