Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Randomize
