Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
