so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
home. puking in laundry basket.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Randomize
