So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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