well you can't waste a boner
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
