talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
