The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I FOUND THE LEGS
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Randomize
