But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize