Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
