i jhust puked up my retainher.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
