never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
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