her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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