Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
