I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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