i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
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