D3 body, D1 cock
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Welp...herpes.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
