If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
